Thursday’s Story

I have known Thursday since I moved to Rhode Island in 2018. Thursday has been part of my dance journey in Rhode Island, I have taught her since I started teaching at my curent studio and watched her progress into a polished dancer and beginner teacher. I support Thursday in everything she does and would consider her one of my closest friends at the dancer studio. She has so much heart and drive and is always exploring and discovering the next fun thing to do. 

When I asked Thursday if she would help me with my thesis work she jumped striaght into the opportunity. Since Thursday so graciously offered to help me and spend some of her time with me I offered to swap an interview for a private lesson.

Scroll for her Bag and her interview. 

CB: What is your dancer name?


T: Thursday, like Thirsty Thursday, ayyy.


CB: What clubs have you worked at?


T: I’ve worked in Connecticut, at Mynx, Groton. I’m currently working at Foxy (Note; The Foxy Lady, Providence RI).


CB: How long have you been dancing?


T: 2 years


CB:  Okay, so, the first question is, How do you prepare to get ready when you go to the club? Do you prepare at home? Do you wait until you’re in the dressing room and come in looking regular. DO  you mentally prepare yourself or is it just a physical transformation kinda thing?


T: I think my mental preparation takes longer than my physical. My makeup takes like 30 minutes tops, and my hair, I have to straighten it, takes 30 minutes, so it’s just an hour. And then I have to like, make sure my outfits are clean, so that is some extra time, and then I have to pick out my outfits and make sure I have the mental preparation. That for me is like, double checking I have everything because there have been times where I have like, you know you have to drive an hour and you just want to make sure you have everything, you know, cuz like that can make or ruin your night. If I’m missing my favourite shoe or something, it’ll just make me want to go home. I do yoga, so I’ll stretch and just feed myself affirmations. I have this deck of cards that say different affirmations on it so I’ll just pick one and read whatever relates. I also pray, I even pray at work a lot. Like before I go on stage or if I feel uncomfortable at any point just to make sure that everything turns out fine. Annndddd, what else?


CB: When you do your yoga and your affirmations and your entire mental prep, are you doing that on the drive, or at home, on the floor?


T: I do my make up at home, well it could be like, I don’t know, sometimes I finish my makeup at work. I’m trying to think of like, sometimes it can be distracting at home. I’ll take breaks, and I’ll like, you know... but yeh I think that’s mostly it. I just want to like make sure that I am stretched out. Sometimes I have to rush to get ready though since I have two jobs right now so I’ll go straight from there to the club so I have just the two-hour window to kinda eat stretch and do all that within the time frame.


CB: And how does that affect you, coming into the space of the club when the time window is way shorter, and you don’t have enough preparation time before you go in? Do you feel like there is a difference or is it just like like it kinda sucks?


T: Yeh, it just sucks. I feel a little more tired like I find that I have a better night when I’ve had a good nights sleep and I can prepare the whole day just how I want.


CB: Okay, so the next question. Within the club setting, when you’re talking to a client or whatever, what space do you find (obviously generalising between the different clubs right) you can get a customer and make the most money from that customer. Is it going up to the bar, is it like right after you get off your stage set and you go to someone sitting by, is it someone that sitting alone, making no eye contact in the middle of the floor and you just pull up a chair?


T: I think, well when you get off stage obviously, like I’ve had customers say that “once you’re off stage you’re nowhere to be found” and it’s like you get so busy.


CB: And clean yourself...


T: Yeh I go put my money away and come up and there are already guys like wanting dances and then, I find like if you go up to groups of guys, sometimes they’re a little more hesitant and they’ll look at their friend if you ask them for a dance, and you’re like, bruh think for yourself.


CB: You’re here for a reason *laughs*


T: yeh * laughs* and then also what really plays into it is like how drunk they are. Some guys literally go there to just, they know what they want. Those are the best ones. I used to work retail, so it’s like you either like this shirt or you don’t and you put it back. They know what type of girl they want and how much money they want to spend. Either you meet those requirements or not. Some guys are just, like, shy. I have a lot of urgency in the club so if I see a guy I want to be the first person that they see or remember. I want to make sure they know my name, when people walk in I say “ hi welcome” and then I introduce myself, “ If you need anything let me know” blah blah blah, or if they want me to sit with them it goes right there and then and it happens. Some guys just need time to feel it out and get drinks in them.


CB: Do you find that watching the entrance is the key to making more of your money?


T: Well you just really want to read the room. You just really want to know who’s in there, you want to watch peoples mannerisms and body language. If they’re just sitting at the bar and getting drinks all night. I know at Mynx that happened a lot. They go there just to see the bartenders. The other people you just make friends with and will maybe just give you some tips. Some guys will give you money just to leave them alone. I make more money when I can pay attention to them so...


CB: Okay so, this is going to be more of a compare and contrasting question. Take a second to think about when you’re on the stage vs when you off and sitting at the bar vs when you’re off in a VIP or Champagne room, or on the side giving a lap dance, vs the entrance or dressing room. You know, the main areas of the club. And think about the words that we have been talking about, control, desire, dirty, intimacy, labour, manipulation, permanence, performance etc. How is each space different? When you’re on the stage do you feel more control, and control in the fact that it’s like you are controlling them vs when you’re on the floor where you might feel more intimacy because you can get a bit closer etc. I’ll ask you areas of the club one by one and prompt when you’re ready, sound good?


T: Okay


CB: How do you feel when you’re on stage? And what power dynamics do you notice?


T: I feel like the most powerful in the room. In my head, this is a motto I go by “Own the stage” so like literally the stage is my bitch and everyone watching me loves me so *embarrassed laugh*


CB: No, yeh, like they’re all watching you. You know, you’re taller, you’re at least 3 feet higher than them.


T: Mmhmm.


CB: Plus your heels, if you climb the pole you’re even taller. You can see over their heads


T: yeh.


CB: And then so, when you’re at the bar, so if you’re sitting with someone, or just talking to the bartender or waiting for people to come in.


T: You said, what’s the word? Power?


CB: Yeh


T: So I can use those kinds of words


CB: Yeh, what’s your energy. You could say something like, “ I feel like there is less intimacy, I don’t feel as close to other people” or pleasure is another fun one, Money, performance, stage. If there is any other word that you want to use that fits better please use that one too! Just personally, if you’re sitting at the bar, how do you feel personally in relation...


T: Okay, so, at the bar, I feel less... less control, because now I’m competing with like the drinks, and trying to get them away from the bar. And then the stage I said I feel most powerful. Right now it’s less intimate because there is a glass between you and the customer, they can’t hear you. This is the good part though, they can’t touch you. Because some guys will literally give you a dollar and grope their shit on you.


CB: So, side conversation. If someone gives you a dollar and gropes the shit outta you how do you react. How does that change your feelings and your control?


T:I mean, I’ve literally slapped someone’s hand before, I’ve literally said no, but thats really it, and they pretty much get it. I mean they either feel really bad about it or they get mad and just walk away, but it’s like, whatever, don’t touch me.


CB: Yeah totally. Okay, so what about when you’re in the VIP or Champagne room, where it is a bit more private.


T: I feel like at that part the customer really feels in control because they just paid for something and they’re kinda like expecting something. Still, though, I feel like the dancer is in control, we can like. There’s that window and you can perform at your own pace. So like, as much as they want you to do something you can be like okay wait, or just dance around it for as long as you want.


CB: And so I guess to second that When a client then goes “well x said that she would do this” which is the classic, how do you feel like the dynamic changes when someone brings another girl and what she does into the conversation? I know it happens a lot in the Rhode Island Clubs.


T: It happens so much, like “well she just charged me this much to do this and she got naked,” blah blah blah, and I’m like, well where two different people. So either you pay this much for me or you pay that much for her. So it’s just, it really helps me. That literally happened to me the other day. Some guy was like, I charged them ( and I always include a tip, like how much I want *laughs*). First of all, I can charge up because we have to pay out the dances and then it’s like, I want extra money.


CB: Of course, it’s your job and if you can get it then why not?


T: But he tried to say that “oh no well she charged me this much” and I’m like, well she a different person so...


CB: She gives you different things


T: Mmhmm...


CB: I want more, sorry, like...


T:CB:Combined: *both laugh*


T: Basically


CB: Ah okay so, we’re going back to the entrance, more so scoping out the entrance. Like sitting in a different area of the club but watching the entrance, what is the dynamic there, how do you feel there?


T: It was different at Mynx, people had to, like, pay a charge so I’d wait for them to get through the door first and all of that. At this club, it’s kinda different because, like, the door is hidden. It looks like when people are walking in... the entrance is the same way as when you are walking down to the dances, like the rooms and stuff.


CB: Interesting...


T: So its kinda built differently. People could be coming from the bathroom, outside, or the rooms


CB: How do you feel like that, just the change in how the architecture changes how you have your own game and how you feel approaching the people you see coming through that area?


T: Yeh so now I have to find out how long they’ve been there. I’ll work that into the conversation “oh when did you get here” blah blah blah because I really don’t know. It’s just a little different because I need to figure out who was here before and who wasn’t


CB: And that just wastes time...


T: Yeah, and it gets pretty busy so at that point its more easier when like at Mynx it’s more open and you can move and keep track of who is coming in.


CB: and the last room is the dressing room


T: *laughs*


CB: This is the one place where the people coming to see you can’t actually go, and you’re surrounded by all the other dancers.


T: I laugh because you’re surrounded by all the other dancers. It’s funny and kinda annoying so like, I don’t know, I don’t want to.


CB: And the manager...


T: I don’t want to sound like that but... and the house mom is there and she just sits there the whole time. The dressing room is a way for me to kinda recoup. A lot of drunk girls in there *laughs* and you just see everyone naked, and like, it’s just like everyone’s kinda, just trying to get away from the customers and just like, yeh, recouping


CB: How do you feel like the power dynamics are in the dressing room because you are surrounded by people who do have the same mindset and,


T: Well, honestly, I really try to hide my money from them, like, I won’t count it in front of them or like, I will just put it away like, like, even hide. I just don’t want, first of all, people knowing how much money I have, and second oof you don’t need to know how much money I have. I don’t know, I don’t want to give people any ideas.


CB: Everyone is like, how much did you make?


T: That question is so annoying, but it’s also kinda necessary to ask someone that you trust I guess that won’t be awkward because it gives you, not like a sense of, I guess there’s no measure of it because everyone’s going to make different amounts. It’s so funny because people will try to, they’ll come down to the dressing room and be like “oh I’m not making much money tonight because my hairs curly” and they like to try to like, I forgot the word, predict yeh, they try to predict what makes them more money. Something like, they try to make things more normal or but there’s really no way to tell how much money you’re going to make. It could be a slow night in the club and you can make as much as a busy night so it’s just like, I call it the magic of the club like there’s a lot of magic that goes on.


CB: This question starts to touch on what we were talking about with the private rooms. If you think that your answer might just be a little repetitive we can just skip it. Again, talking about power dynamics, how is it different in a secluded area vs a half secluded area where everyone is giving lapdances vs fully open? How many people can see you and how does that change the dynamics between the client and you?


T: It changes a lot. So, my set-up right now is like a maze. The seats are in a maze, and there is this one seat that’s in the cuts, that’s where no one walks by you and it’s kinda closed off, and I’ll find that guys, like, I’ll ask them, and they say can we go somewhere more private. And I think that it’s more of, like, what makes the customer more comfortable at that point. Sometimes they’ll even ask me “where do you usually like to sit” and the power is in my hands and so I’ll ask them where are you most comfortable sitting and just because of the maze set up they’ll be like “oh just somewhere where it is more private”.  Sometimes the private seats are taken so I’m like “this is all we got” and we’ll push through it.


CB: Do you find that people will be okay with paying more for it to be more private...


T: Yeh


CB: Obviously time span is also different but...


T: That’s how I sell it sometimes. That’s pretty much like the first things I say, more private, less interruptions. I think it’s, like, less distracting so they can just be more comfortable and focused.


CB: That’s a great word, can we do distracting?


T: Yeh! Ah yeh, distracting is like if there is a lot of other people walking by there’s a lot of stimulation.


CB: So when you travelled to Mynx, vs going to Foxy, what was the appeal of the travel?


T: So basically because it is more private from where I live. Like I’ll be dancing and legit I’ll see my ex’s family in there. Which is like, it’s a little awkward, but not really because like they’re the ones in there and it’s my job so of course, I’m going to be at my job. I saw someone I used to go to elementary school with, and it’s just all a part of the distractions, but not too much. You know it’s still like oh shit there’s someone in here who knows me so, but I like meeting new people.


CB: Do you think that the drive makes it easier to go into the setting. Like that space where you’re not at home but you’re not at the club. It’s your own *gestures as a sphere*.


T: Yeh it’s very therapeutic, and the drive made me more focused. Since I’m driving this far, or like either way you put goals in your head, but you have to factor in the commute and how much gas you’re spending and how much energy is worth it. Towards the end, it started getting not worth it for me once the pandemic hit. It didn’t make sense to drive that far to only make $200. I mostly went that far just because it was my first year and I kinda still wasn’t comfortable with it myself, so I wanted to get a feel with like I said, less distractions and just get away from people that know me. But then you’ll get used to it and get over it once you get more comfortable.


CB: The next question is about the double persona. When you are Thursday is that a whole different person, does she only exist when you’re in that space, or does she also exist when you’re in the dressing room, or when you’re travelling to the club? How do you and Thursday interact? Are there ever times in the club when it’s XXXXXXX and not Thursday?


T: *Giggling the whole time* that’s a good question. It’s a tough one because it’s so hard, it’s kinda like we’re putting on a mask. I think that sometimes it’s hard for me to really distinguish the two. Thursday to me, she’s, like, more outgoing and has to really put herself out there and like, be less serious and she knows what she’s doing, and everyone wants her. She’s just really confident. XXXXXXXX is just like really shy, and like, quieter and reserved. Having the two it’s like really cool and like they complement and need each other. It’s still me, it’s just a different version of me, it’s just like whatever I want people to see. She’s just finessing, and she’s my own too *giggles*


CB: Yeah, totally, its kinda like you get to escape.


T: It is an escape!


CB: So this next question is about the relationships you have with the bouncer, the doorman, DJ, manager, Bartenders, and the House mom.


T: Yeh, those are important...


CB: So when you are working how does the bouncer...


T: Yeh, I think that’s really how you can manipulate how your night goes or how your shifts go. Because if you tip people out better they are more likely to do what you want. So like, let’s say the DJ if you tip him out well he’s always going to play music the way you want it, or like, there are people who are just more likely to favour you or do your favours. It’s kinda messed up because if someone has bad attention in the club... yeah, basically they can be bought. I try to just tip like, I don’t know, I tell them all the time that I wish I had more but like, here it is. I don’t like playing into that manipulation too much, but it’s always good to tip people.


CB: So with the DJ would you find that the relationship there is like if you start tipping you can like be fully in control of your own hustle but if not he kinda has a little more control.


T: Not me, but other girls who are tipping him better (have more control).


CB: Oh okay, so it’s not that he has the control, but the other people tipping him do. What about the bouncer, how does that change? Is there ever a time where you feel like if you don’t tip the bouncer, and that if a kinda shitty situation arose...


T: I think it’s really important to know the bouncers, not only does it affect the hustle but it also affects the safety. Going back to someone touching you in the way you don’t want them to, you can easily just like flag him down or like call out to them and he’ll be there but like if you don’t have any type of relationship with the bouncer it is harder for that to be taken care of.  


CB: What about the bartenders? DO you feel like there is any kind of dynamic between the bartender and your relationship with them?


T: Yeah you can work with the bartenders, if you’re a drinker they’re more likely to be able to come to you. They know that like you work hard and that if guys spend money on you they’re more likely to come over to you if you’re sitting with a guy because they know they’ll get tipped.


CB: And the last person is the house mom. Which obviously some club have and others don’t.


T: Yeh, At Mynx there’s no house mom. At Foxy the house mom is... It’s a new thing to me. She literally has a set up there, so she has a locker, a desk that she sits at...


CB: She has a desk!? What?


T: That’s what I was saying! Like she just sits at a space so it’s really just like her area so she’s there and she does you favours. Like if you need her to watch anything for you or help count your tips, she’s there. These house moms, they bring in food. They have everything, so, like, I think they really do expect to get tipped. Right now they get just get $7. Every girl has to pay them $7 at least, I try to give them like $10.


CB: And since the House mom. How is it different when there isn’t a house mom and you come into the dressing room and that’s kinda your space to get away vs at Foxy when there already is a house mom and there is another presence guaranteed to be there? How does that change your perception of how you feel in that space?


T: Honestly like in private clubs it’s fine. At Mynx, it’s a smaller room, and at Foxy it’s way bigger. I don’t know. I think it’s kinda like, it’s not too annoying because she just kinda minds her business. Sometimes I feel safer than I can ask her for things or if I need help I can tell her. Also, it’s annoying because there is that person there


CB: Especially when you just want to get away.


T: Yeh and they tell you because we have to wear these wraps to cover our, butt, and if you’re not wearing one she’ll be like “don’t forget”, literally like a mom, and I’m just like no... I guess like the other aspects when she’s just like there all the time, it’s good, it’s good and bad.


CB: Okay, and very very last question, When you’re working what word from our beginning list do you feel the most, regardless of the space you’re in. Do you feel control, intimacy, or desire? How do you think about that as you do your work?


T: Like during the whole shift?


CB: Yeh, like during the whole shift, regardless of where you are. Bathroom to VIP to ETC


T: So control; I think you can control like intimacy and desire. Who do I want to walk slower by or how do I want to look, or how much skin do I want to show. You’re controlling the attraction I think and how people are perceiving you and being attracted to. I like the intimacy, you can control that just by like, the conversation. It really is the most intimate part of my job because you really get to find out what this person likes and what you need to control him?


CB: Do you find that manipulation and control are almost the same word, or do you think that manipulation is almost more maniacal?


T: *nods*


CB: You think it’s evil?


T: Yeh


CB: Evil on whose terms?


T: The person doing the manipulating is evil. Or even like sometimes customers can be manipulative too, to get you to do what they want, they’ll try to make you feel bad or something. But you can also manipulate by using the club setting as a form of manipulation. Maybe I’m not thinking about it correctly. I do think there are times when manipulation can be good because maybe I’ll tell them what I’m trying to save up money for. I’ll be manipulative with the window, like, this is how much time we have don’t waste this precious time. Let’s go save this opportunity because I’m here now and once other people see me I’ll be gone.


CB: So like manipulation to stay in control.


T: Yeh and I think it’s evil because the person doesn’t know you’re being manipulative but like its not evil in the sense where like, I don’t think how I do it is that evil because like Its more urgency since this is how I get them to spend money and I just want to get inside their head.  How it’d be evil is maybe talking badly about other dancers so that they’re more likely not to, but like, yeah, that’s just kinda like drama stuff.